Farmer And Lawyer

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural area. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence.
As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked the lawyer what he was doing.
The lawyer responded, “I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I’m going to retrieve it.”

The old farmer replied. “This is my property, and your not coming over here.”

The indignant lawyer replied. “I’m one of the best trial lawyers in the city, and if you don’t let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything that you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, “Apparently, you don’t know how we do things in Villages. We settle small disagreements like this, with the Three Kick Rule.”

The lawyer asked, “What is the Three Kick Rule?”

The farmer replied, “Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth until someone gives up.”

The Lawyer agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly gets down from the tractor and walked up to the Lawyer. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer’s groin, which dropped him to his knees.
His second kick nearly ripped the nose off his face.
The lawyer was flat on his belly, when the farmer’s third kick to a kidney nearly causing him to give up, but didn’t.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, “Okay, you old tossed, now it’s my turn.”
The old farmer smiled and said,

“Now, I give up, You can keep the duck!”


Thanks for visiting this Blog, keep visiting regularly for more funny and interesting stuffs.
Like our page on facebook, Weekly mails click here.

It Happens Only In INDIA Part-III

It Happens Only In INDIA Part-I Click Here.

It Happens Only In INDIA Part-II Click Here.

Thanks for visiting this Blog, keep visiting regularly for more funny and interesting stuffs.
Like our page on facebook, Weekly mails click here.

Indian Hell

A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is different hell for each country.
He goes to the German hell and asks, “What do they do here?”
He was told, “First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and beats you for rest of the day.”
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on and checks out the USA hell as well as Russian hell and many more countries…

He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell..
Then he comes to the Indian hell and finds that there is long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed, he asks, What do they do here?”
He was told “First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil comes in and beats you for rest of the day.”
“But that is exactly the same as all the other hells– so why are so many people waiting to get in here?” asked the man.
Because maintenance is so bad that the electric chair does not work, someone has stolen all the nails from the bed and Indian devil is former Govt. servant, so he comes in and signs the register and then goes to the canteen!

Future planning

Young Man: Sir, may I know the time, please?

Old Man: Certainly not.

Young Man: Sir, but why? What are you going to loose, if you tell me the time?

Old Man: Yes, I may loose something if I tell you the time.

Young Man: But Sir, can you tell me how?

Old Man : See, if I tell you the time you will definitely thank me and may be tomorrow again you will ask me the time.

Young Man: Quite possible.

Old Man: May be we meet two three times more and you will ask my name and address.

Young Man: Quite possible.

Old Man: One day you may come to my house saying you were just passing by and came into wish me. Then as a courtsey, I will offer you a cup of tea.
After my courteous approach you will try to come again.
This time you will appreciate tea and ask who has made
it.?

Young Man: Possible

Old Man: made itThen I will tell you that my daughter has and I will then
have to introduce my young and pretty daughter to you &; you will admire my daughter.

Young Man: Smiles. 

Old Man: Now onwards you will try to meet my daughter again and again. You will offer her to go out for a movie together and a date with you.

Young Man: Smiles

Old Man: My daughter may start liking you and start waiting for you. After meeting regularly you will fall in love with her and propose her for marriage.

Young Man: Smiles
Old Man: One day both of you will come to me and tell me about your love and ask for my permission.

Young Man: Oh Yes! and smiles

Old Man: (Angrily) Young man, I will never marry my
Daughter to a person like you who does not even own a
Watch.


Thanks for visiting this Blog, keep visiting regularly for more funny and interesting stuffs.
if any guy want to share his any funny or amazing mail then you are most welcome. Just mail that at dannyleo007@gmail.com with your name and place. That thing will be published here with your name and 
place. Thanks.
Like our page on facebook, Weekly mails http://www.facebook.com/pages/Weekly-Mails/261957273844420

It Happens Only In INDIA Part-II

                                                                                                                  

  Secound part of It Happens only in india, for first part click here.

Thanks for visiting this Blog, keep visiting regularly for more funny and interesting stuffs.
if any guy want to share his any funny or amazing mail then you are most welcome. Just mail that at dannyleo007@gmail.com with your name and place. That thing will be published here with your name and 
place. Thanks

It Happens Only In INDIA

Funny stuff from Indian streets..

Please leave comment how you like this....Visit daily for more interesting stuffs..

Management v/s Engineers

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She reduced altitude and spotted a man below.

She descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am."

The man below replied "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist. "I am", replied the man.

"How did you know?"

"Well, answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip even more."

The man below responded, "You must be in management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the man, "You don't know where you are or where you're going.You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems?!!"

BOTTOM LINE: just imagine the management guys who are basically engineers... no wonder!!!!!

The Smartest President.

 

THANKS!! For visiting my Blog. Keep Visiting for more funny stuffs..

Letter To Bill Gates

Letter from Mr Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr Bill Gates of Microsoft

Subject: Problems with my new computer.


Dear Mr Gates,

We  have bought a computer for our home and we have found some
problems which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you
to check this.

2. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. We request you to change that to
'Sit', so that we can use the computer while sitting.

3. Why is there no 're-scooter' available in the system? I find only
're-cycle', but I only own a scooter.


4. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the
door key and we tried to trace the key with this ' find' button, but were
unable to do so. Please rectify this problem.

5. My child learnt 'Microsoft Word': now he wants to learn 'Microsoft
Sentence', so when you will provide that?

6. I brought a CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which
shows 'My Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?

7. It is surprising that windows says 'My Pictures' but there is not
even
a single photo of mine. When will you add my photo?

8. There is 'Microsoft Office' ..... what about 'Microsoft Home', since I
use the PC only at home.

9. You've provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past
Documents'?

10. You've provide 'My Network Places'. For God's sake please do not
provide
'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my
office hours.

Regards,

Banta

PS: Last one from me to Mr Bill Gates :

Sir, how come your name is Gates but you are selling WINDOWS?